DEGPUG TEXT FILE CO. PRESENTS

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      POINTDEXTER SMALLPECKER'S COMPLETE GUIDE TO:
	       SEX  DRUGS & ROCK AND ROLL
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PART I: SEX
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  1] Sex is the most one of the most beautiful, wholesome things that money can
buy.  Why not enjoy it for free.  No, you will not grow hair on your palms, or
go blind.  Ever see a guy walking down the street with one big strong arm and
one wimpy arm?	Well thats a guy who didn't remember to alternate hands.

  2] But, what if want to enjoy sex with someone besides yourself?  Well I have
one little phone # that can satisfy all your wants and desires Yes, call
SEX-O-RAMA at 800-424-9090 and just ask the operator to order you one of their
Deluxe K-Girl's and you to can share the beauty of sex with your girl for the
incredibly low price of $59.95 plus shipping, handling, and applicable sales
tax.  Inflates in only 2 minutes and comes complete with full instructions.


PART II: DRUGS
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  1] Many people find life hard, tiring, depressing, dull, dreary to say the
least.	With drugs, this kind of person can live fully again at least until the
drugs wear off.  Drugs such as Pot, Coke, Heroin, etc.	provide outlets for
many depressed and lonely people.  I reccommend you try No-Doz.  Yes, I bet
you're thinking, 'why No-Doz?  How can it futher enhance my life?' Well the
simple truth is No-Doz works just as well as any other drug, its legal and can
be bought at any 7-Eleven store.

  2] Many people enjoy smoking pot.  Personally, I enjoy Banana Peals.	Try
them sometime.	You can eat the banana too.


PART III: ROCK & ROLL
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  1] Many people ask me why I don't like todays music.  Well the simple fact is
that this is a falsehood.  I listen everyday to many of the groups you young
people consider popular such as Michael Jackson, Menudo, Culture Club, and
Kiss.  I keep on the latest trends and I know the latest rock lingo, so I can
dig it you know, like it's far out, like fer sure.  Okay so like all you cats
can dig me now since like I've proved myself, like, okay like, read the next
paragraph.

THIS WAS TOLD TO ME BY A REAL COOL CAT:

  2] Make sure the next time you have a girl, in your car, that you play the
second side of Led Zeppelin IV.


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-P.D.S.P. [Point-Dexter Small-Pecker. Small was my mothers maiden name]


 LOOK FOR PART II COMING OUT SOON:

POINT DEXTER'S COMPLETE GUIDE TO
  CHIPS, DIPS, CHAINS AND WHIPS