---------------------------(w0ol #5: no comprende?)----------------------------

hola, buenos dias, ese w0ol esta numero cinco.  ese w0ol esta en espanol. 
no comprende? bece me culo, cabaza de mierde.

ok, w0ol #5, hmm.. nothing is as graceful as a dot...........................
.................................. <click> *BANG* *BANG* ok. dots are 
bad.. anyway on to something you do not know
 
-----------------------(late night show wars)-------------------------------

you sat back
you thought they were over
you were wrong. (well ovbiously)
thats right
the w0ol show.
ok, i lied, the w0ol show isnt a late night show, but it IS a daytime 
talk show, and a very good one i might add.. ok, here is how it works.. 
you all know how boring and stupid daytime talk shows are, basically a 
bunch of people gather in a room with a few freaks on a stage and the 
freaks are in some sort of argument, the nice, caring, supprotive (jock 
strap?) audience, being such good humans, support the freaks and they 
resolve their problems with eachother, then the audience shuns them all 
because well, theyre freaks. ok, so here is how the w0ol show works.. 
flowchart time
                  tickets are sold: 200 seats, 208 tickets
                                     | 
                               people arrive
                                   |     |
                        early people    the late-eight
                         |                   |
                  audience seats           boxes (*)--------\
                   |                        |                 \
         watch people be tortured       put in box with gun     \
             |                                 |                  \
  clap, support, jockstrap like behaviour    are tortured           \
          |                                       |                  |
       leave                            kill themselves in anguish   |
                                                                     |
                                                        special 2 person box
                        
* = hot girls who want any op on #w0ol or #y0lk
                                        
as you can see this show would make for GREAT entertainment, and also 
provide education on whips/chains/knives/guns/hot embers/papercuts & 
vinegar/ect, which would help our young and still naieve society.. ok, 
simply put, it would rule as a show, it would get good ratings, and 
everyone involved excluding the torture victims would have fun and earn 
tons of money... on to another theory

------(w0ol theorum #1: cherry coke contains anti-depressant drugs)---------

ok, first off id like to say im sorry for saying "theorum" but its the 
only word for that type of think... ok, here, there are steps for this, 
so prepare to get up, print this, and bring it around a bit... ok, here 
you go: walk somewhere that sells/you can steal cherry coke, buy/steal 
one, walk home(optional), ok, look at the bottle, pretty fucked up ehh? 
cherry's mixed with coke? gotta be drugged, ok, go somewhere and get 
depressed, ie: if you suck at football go play a football game with the 
jocks and then realize that football is the most important thing in life 
and that you really suck in it, this should depress you, ok, open the 
bottle, drink it all, you go from waaah to YEAH!@!#!# in like 30 seconds, 
druggery again, ok, so we have now 2 forms of proof that cherry coke has 
drugs in it, now, for our last one flip it over and look on the back 
under ingredients
         INGREDIENTS: Lucrosesodamathyle, Orange-falvor, Terrorist 
Semen, Octenathane Foglyceride, Dantanothl, Raid-bug-spray, 
Un-saturator-filling, Gas, Stuff

now take the first letter from each of these ingredients... LOTS OF 
DRUGS, its a sEcReT message, dont tell anyone, cherry coke has lots of 
drugs in it, now that youve read that go buy some, i always do when im 
depressed

--------------------------(barney)------------------------------------------

Barney's log: fartdate 230.35.54.666
Voice Capture:
hell, o, this is barney, eye am stationed outside the famed "kid mall" 
where many kids are playing, my mission today is to bring the kids under 
the so-called barney-trance and lure them to toy stores, please not i am 
satan

Barney's log: fartdate 230.35.54.668
Voice Capture:
hello, we have infultrated the base and made many of the kids assume 
strange sexual posi..... i mean we have induced a large case of 
barney-trance, and have lured many kids to toy stores where 
approximately 8240 purchase have been made.. we have also started a new 
line of <clang> <door opening> 
Baby Bop: oh my barney! i didnt know you had two tails!
Barney: good god!@ TURN AROUND
Baby Bop: why are you petting that one? does it hurt
<barney kicks him out and locks the door>
where was i? ah yes, we have a new line of barney toys en route to this 
station and we soon hope to have them all under our control
this is sata.. i mean barney signing off

Barney's log: fartdate 230.35.54.666
Voice Capture: 
we have seized control of the base and everyone is under our control, 
time to move on to earth.. muah ah ah ahahha!
goodbye, from satan.. i mean barney of course, that was a simple error

------------------------(scare-a-delic)-----------------------------------     

yeah i know, he must be stopped, and here is how, the super eleet plans 
to the barney bomb: 
             .--.      .-----------------------.
   .  ' `   <|   `'--'`                        | / pin to set it off
   .  . '  <<|             BOMB STUFF--CIRCUT---- 
     '  .   <|   .,--,.                        |
             `--'      `-----------------------'
/   firey stuff to propel it

this will land on barney, if you aim it correctly, it should kill him, 
mabey even baby bop, go build one and ship it to me.

------------(empty folder)-----------------------------------------------

shame on you macintosh
naming you new folders "empty folder"
sure they're empty for a while, but soon they fill up, well FUCK YOU!@ 
thatl teach you to label things and expect everything to be the way it 
always was, well the world changes, people change, and right now, i have 
to change my underwear

----------------------(gruesom)----------------------------------------

hey dont look

------------------(you going yet?)-------------------------------------

yeah i think my creativity is used for the week
hmm

---------------------(shhh nobody tell him about the ascii)------------

oh well i guess thats a rap
but i feel kind of like im missing something, could it be? OOhhhhhhhhh 
yeah, ascii time

-------------(UGH, well, draw something reasonable)--------------------

today i will draw for you.. ugh.. ive drawn everything on my desk 
already.. hmmm.. ill draw.. a nifty-q dollar bill..

.-----------------------------------------------------.
|   .  .-.  .                             .  .-.  .   | 
|  `  `- |   '            _._            `  `- |   '  |
|  `,   `.  ,'        .|'`   `'|.        `,   `.  ,'  |
|                    ||  oOo.  ||                     |
|                   .|  []-[]o. |.                    |
|   .-.             ||  | | |   ||               .-.  |
|  `- |            .|   \---/    |.             `- |  |
|    `.            ||            ||               `.  |
`-----------------------------------------------------'

that took me hours.. ok, print that out, snipit to size, and buy food
counterfitting is cool
hmmm, ok, hmm what else, whats good...yeah..mmm...batteries?
              .-.
           |~' + `~|
           |   d   |
           |   u   |
           |   r   |
           |   a   |
           | hell- |
           |_______|

the positive end of that battery looks a lot like a breast, im proud

speaking of which
                .-.
     /o-/-\__-~'   `~~-__-~'`------------'|
    <_____---.______-_.--___.-----------_-'

hey everyone, theres a girl with huge breasts and NO ARMS!#!^% quick!@ 
get her!@!

ok, anyway, hmm. lastly, id like to draw you something i see all the time

             .-----------------------.
            / /~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\ \ 
          / / . . . . . . . . . . . . \ \
        / / . . . . . . . . . . . . . . \ \
       \ \ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . / /
         \ \___________________________/ /
          `-----------------------------'
its a port of a sort
w0ol
ok i end now
oh yeah
if you see these people kill them:
hansolo
firewalker
w0ol to that

-----------------------------(the end)------------------------------------

finally.

---------------------------+ eDiToR CoMmEnT +----------------------------------

no.

---------------------------------+ InDeX +------------------------------------

 this is so you can find them:

        #1: w0ol comes from sheep! (nettle)
        #2: the electric santa (nettle)
        #3: gourmet food, gourmet boredom (nettle)
        #4: toast some pixie stix in the hour that doesnt exist (nettle)
        #5: no comprende? (nettle)

wow

-------------------------------+ people of w0ol +------------------------------

nettle
(thats all right now.. so write sumfin!#)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_ email addresses _~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                          
nettle:

nettle@novasys.com
nettle@nevermind.lag.novasys.com
nettle@nexxus.novasys.com

thats it..