-------------------------------------------------------------------------- mmmmmmmmmm$$$$ .s&$P""""7$&s. $$$$"""""7$&s. s$$$P"""""$&s. .s&$P""""7$&s. gggg $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ ggggp****q$$$$ `7$$bmmmmmgggg $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ gggg $$$$ tMM$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ $$$$ `7$$bmmmmd$$P' `7$$bmmmmd$$P' $$$$ $$$$ `7$$bmmmmd$$$$ `7$$bmmmmd$$P' -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jonas E'Zine, Volume 2, Issue 6 (C) 1996 by Jonas Productions, all rights reserved. Copyrights to stories, articles, and illustrations are the property of their creators, unless otherwise noted. The contents of this publication may not be reproduced in whole or in part without consent of the copyright owner. Jonas may be freely distributed as long as this notice remains in place, and no fee is charged for it's retrieval. look at me, I can write a melody, but I can't expect a soul to care. Superdrag / "Who Sucked Out The Feeling?" -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jonas E'Zine Volume 2, Issue 6 August 28, 1996 Contents: (1) - Edicius' Editorial (2) - How I Got This Way [essay] - by Big Hurt (3) - Adios Fidel [essay] - by Eightball (4) - Discriminate Perceptions [essay] - by Jestapher (5) - Fight [essay] - by Mercuri (6) - The Skirt Incident [story] - by Edicius (7) - The All But The Kung-Fu Class [story] - by Ben Ohmart (8) - Poetry - various writers (9) - Reviews -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (1) - Edicius' Editorial I really wish I didn't over-think and over-analyze every single facet of my existence. To me, everything is symbolic of something much bigger, something much grander. Tonight, I shaved. "BIG DEAL" Well, kinda, sorta. It's a big deal to me. Not because of the fact that I nicked myself in about 10 places. No, it's the fact that I shaved my goatee off. Now, my goatee and I had a special bond. Since June, everywhere I went was with my goatee. It's been with me for the entire Summer. This Summer has been one of, if not the greatest Summers of my entire life. I've met new people, I've gone to new places, I've been out and doing new things, and I've just had a great time this year. To me, my goatee was symbolic of the last visible reminder of this truly fantastic Summer. As I said, it was with me through every single thing I've done this Summer. Concerts, parties, friends; all of them were witness to my goatee. I've met people this Summer for the first time. I've had people tell me that I could pass for a 19 year-old. Now, I don't know if those people were just stupid, or were just trying to make an ass of me, but the thing that counts most is, I liked how my goatee looked. But now, it's gone. Cut off in a flash of sheers and blades over my bathroom sink. Why did I cut it off? Well, that wasn't my own call. In just over a week, I'll be starting school again. The fact that I go to a private Catholic school means I have to abide by their dress codes. They don't allow any facial hair, even sideburns have to be kept reasonably short. So, I had to do it; sooner or later. Alas, the pieces all fall into place. I'm going to bed earlier now, I'm finishing my Summer reading list, and I'm getting all the shit I need for school. The pieces fall into place, in front of my disbelieving face. I look towards the next few months as a turning point. I seriously don't know what the hell is going to go on between now and the end of the year. I don't know how well I'll be able to handle a social life, school, and all the work I do on the computer. Down the road, I look to getting a job.. and further down the road, I wouldn't mind having a girlfriend. You throw those things into a mix, and things are bound to get severely fucked up. I'm looking towards having an interesting year in school. I'm going to be taking some harder classes, most important is my AP US History class. I need to do very good this year, I'm a Junior this year. I want to do good; but I don't know how well I'll do. I want to do good, but I also want to have fun and do all the stuff I've been doing this Summer. In my heart, I know what's right. But, what's right isn't what makes me happy. Thus, we have conflict. I don't want this Summer to end. I want everything to be the same. I want to go to bed when everyone else is waking up; I want to wake up when everyone else is getting home from work. I want to geek on the computer for days at a time without taking a shower. I want to talk to the people I like to do what I want to do. My bathroom sink is clogged with hair, my face looks fatter, and my Summer draws to a close. I need to stop over-analyzing everything. ----- Man oh man. Don't you hate it when you copy something to a disk, and then give that disk to a friend, but it turns out that the disk that you gave him wasn't the disk with the stuff you coped for him, but in actuality it was a disk full of pornographic pictures? Man, that just SUCKS. They were some of my favorite pictures, too. ----- --- SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT --- Jonas is proud to announce that we were selected to participate in an exhibition of youth media that will be taking place at the New Museum of Contemporary Art, in New York City, over the coming months. We ask that anyone that is able to attend this exhibition does so, for it is sure to be a very unique event. Below is the full press release that was issued by the New Museum explaining the exhibition and related information. ----- alt.youth.media September 6-November 5, 1996 organized by The New Museum of Contemporary Art, 583 Broadway (between Prince and Houston), New York, New York 10012 P: 212-219-1222 E-mail: newmuseum@thorn.net No other generation has been more thoroughly schooled in media culture and the use of media technologies than today's youth. They are not only consuming media, but also actively transforming and producing a new media landscape. alt.youth.media presents computer, video, audio and print media projects by and about teens and young adults that offer alternatives to representations of youth culture prevalent in mainstream media. Community, cultural identity, dating, sexuality, gangs, family, school environment, and violence are among the topics explored by young media artists working independently and in collaboration with adult artists, educational programs, and media arts organizations. The exhibition includes: Photography series by Adrienne Salinger entitled "In My Room: Teenagers in Their Bedrooms" Video programs including "Some Girls in the Hood" by young women from the Allegheny School, "Youth on Racism: I Dare You to Cross This Line" produced by Community TV Network in Chicago, and "The Prejudice Project: Attitudes Toward Panhandling" by KYTES in Canada. Two video installations: "Video Machete", a Chicago-based media collective of community activists, video producers, and gang members, presenting first person accounts of gang incidents, and the politics and culture of gangs in Chicago and "Conversation Piece" by Julia Meltzer and Catherine Saalfield in collaboration with youth from The Safety Zone, a drop-in center for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered youth, and from the youth-producers at Bent TV and the Hetrick Martin Institute. Several computer terminals will provide visitors access to over twenty e-zines including "gURL," "geekgrrrl," "Jonas," "rant," "boing boing," and "Spank" and to CD-ROM's like "Teenage Transgression," "The Censorship Project," and "Lies, Lies, Lies." An audio center will offer a listening lounge and an area for a variety of hands-on activities such as the recording and mixing of original tapes using a computer for digitized sound capability, a "broadcast" of a mix of previously recorded programming including interviews, talk shows, DJ sound mixes, and investigative reports on topical news entirely from a youth perspective, and "live" broadcast slots where hosts will be available in the Center and throughout the galleries to engage with and interview visitor in talk-show format on cultural subjects of interest to youth represented in the exhibition. A display and reading area of over 120 youth-oriented zines including "Crap Hound," "Plotz," "Bamboo Girl," "Flatter!," "Thrift Score," "Caught in Flux," "Double Negative," and "Psycho Moto Mini Zine." A zine production area will include a copy machine, graphics supplies, and clip art for visitors to create their own zines. ----- Jonas would like to thank Melanie Franklin and the New Museum of Contemporary Art for selecting Jonas to participate in this event. ----- Jonas would also like to thank Jestapher of Oblivion Magazine. Not only is he a great writer, but he's also a great web designer. He redid the Jonas web site, and it looks great. Thanks, Ben! I redid my homepage, too. Check it out at http://www.cybercomm.net/~edi/ and learn everything you don't want to know about me. I've published more poetry this issue, because I like poetry. If you don't like it, don't read it. If you'd like to submit some of your good poetry, then email me. Otherwise, have a great day. Enjoy Jonas, and email me what you think about Jonas. Until next issue.. -- Tom Sullivan/Edicius -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (2) - How I Got This Way - by Big Hurt Well there has been many events in my life that brought me to where I am today. In the last couple of months I've felt that I've become smarter and more aware. I've become stronger. I was at the hotel just about to leave from Tucson with the baseball team. We had lost two days before, so we didn't play the day before in the tournament. I stayed out late with the team and didn't go to bed until three in the morning. I was in the parking lot, when my baseball coach told me that my mom called that night. I called her and she said she was checking up on me and there was nothing wrong. So I got in the truck with one of my team mates and their mom. I slept in the back, along with another team mate. I didn't sleep that much. I was mostly thinking of what could be wrong. Was I in trouble? Did something happen to the house? I arrived back at my house, where I was dropped off in the afternoon. I went in the house and put my stuff in my room. My mom was sitting on the couch waiting for me. She told me to sit down and I did like she asked. She told me bad news of my Uncle Ray passing away with a little sadness in her voice. I didn't know what to say. But as strong as my mom was, she already called my work for me and said that I wouldn't be in until that Friday. Then she called my coach for me and said I would miss any practices and games that week. She had me talk to my dad. He gave me a talk and some advise and told me to be strong and take care of my mom. Then my encourage me to go do something with my friend, Steve Heck. I did and I talked about life. I really think that my mom wanted to be alone for a little bit longer, before we left that next morning. We I came back that night from my friends house, I packed all of my stuff and double checked it. I went to bed that night and dreamt things that have long passed my mind. My mom and I left for the airport on Tuesday, the following day, and arrived two hours later in Oklahoma. My mom got a rent a car and we traveled over 100 miles to Blackwell, Oklahoma. We went to my Uncle Ray's house and saw his wife and the rest of my family, including my aunts, uncles, and cousins I haven't seen for a long period. It was like a reunion. We went to the memorial service that afternoon on Tuesday. It happened to the Fourth Of July and that evening I spent time with my cousins. Some of them I haven't seen since I was one years old and the other ones it was seven years since the last time I saw them. We talked and walked around and lite off fireworks. I didn't know them that well, so I didn't know how to relate that much. But we managed to get along. The next day we meet at the local church and had the funeral. Everyone was quite. There was so many sad faces. There was so many people crying, mostly family members, like my mom's sisters. It was indeed a sad morning. I even saw my own mom cry. Something I've hardly ever seen. Though it was a sad event, it was a good one. At least for me. But, one thing I regret, is that I talked to my cousins, when they needed me. I saw my cousins Jennifer and Melissa crying. They knew Uncle Ray better than me. I never met the man, which is another thing I regret. I wish I met the man. But the town people and his family said he was a great man. I'm sure I would have liked him. Later on, everyone met for lunch. I talked with cousins, but still felt like I wasn't fitting in with them. So I talked to a few people my mom knew and that we stayed with the night before. I couldn't stand staying with the people my chose to stay with, but my mom and I did anyway. That day we went swimming and had fun while I was there. Spent even more time with my cousins and saw my cousins from Sterling, Colorado for the last time on the trip. I wanted to see them the next morning, but my mom said that we missed them. I cried for so long. I even wrote some songs and poetry. But, I stayed strong, not letting anyone know that I cried and went to the house that my Uncle Ray lived in with his wife. That morning we saw off my cousins from Texas and the rest of my family. I was sad, but managed not to cry. That day I didn't do much. Just stayed around and talked to the people that actually lived in Oklahoma. My Uncle Steve, took us to where he was staying and let us spend the night. I stayed up late, looking at pictures with my mom and Uncle Steve. Then later that night, when I was the only one up, I wrote songs all night about my anger and sadness. I cried for the last time on the trip. The next morning, which would be Friday, we left early, so we could make our trip back to the Oklahoma City airport, which was over 100 miles away. We made the flight back and I got home safe. I wrote all of my cousins that I saw in Oklahoma, but none of them ever wrote back to me. I finally heard from my Aunt Bernice in Sterling, Colorado, when my mom called her and found out that my cousin Nick was in trouble. I still plan on traveling to Sterling, Colorado with a friend to visit them next summer. That should be a good experience also, but last summers event made me very strong. I can tolerate a lot more. It made me be able to write more songs, about my true feelings. It has made me be able to keep a journal and write about my deepest secrets and feelings, which I just started a few months back. I feel the event will soon bring me closer to my cousins, which I haven't seen much over the years, since of the tensions that lay between my mom and her sisters. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (3) - Adios Fidel - by Eightball Like all revolutions, yours started with idealism and noble purpose. The American Revolution led to the Alien and Sedition Acts a dozen years later. The French Revolution to overthrow the oppression of the ruling class led to mass murder by the guillotine. Dr. Castro, you succeeded in overthrowing the incredibly corrupt Batista regime and its cohorts, the mafia casino owners. You lifted the people of Cuba out of grinding poverty. You righted the criminal injustice perpetrated by Batista and his henchmen. You provided free education and medical care to the working class of Cuba. It was a revolutionary step forward. You rid the country of the crime bosses that ran the casinos and robbed the common people. You even came to the United States to make friends with the American people. Unfortunately, your political understanding of public relations was naive at best. You faced two problems that you could never surmount in the U.S. First, you did not understand that Socialism does not sell here. Second, the Cuban wealthy classes, having fled to the U.S., staged a brilliant public relations campaign against you. You were painted bright red. At the height of the Cold War, having a "Communist" within 90 miles of American soil was just unacceptable. So, Dr. Castro, you threw in your lot with the Soviet Union and kept your revolution afloat. But as we all know, the Russians never give away anything for free. In exchange for millions of rubels, you permitted them to establish missile bases on your own soil. The following Cuban Missile Crisis almost led to World War III, an irreconcilable gash between the Americans and you. With the collapse of your Soviet supporters, your economic situation is untenable. Guaranteed medical care means nothing when your hospitals cannot purchase medicine from abroad. The poverty of the masses cannot be improved by simply eliminating the high income group. As all revolutions before have shown, power corrupts even the most noble minded. To hold onto power and use scapegoats, you have established a secret police, political prisons, censorship, and all the other trappings of dictatorship. It is sad that the long suffering Cuban people have not had a chance to participate in the freedom and prosperity that has been sweeping the world. For the sake of your people, resign now and let Cuba have a fresh start. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (4) - Discriminate Perceptions - by Jestapher One might classify me as a "white" male American. I am not a proud "white" male American. I am not a disgraced "white" male American. If I must be any type of "white" male American, I am an apathetic "white" male American. Although I may be apathetic about this unbidden status, I loathe the initial impression I make many a time on account of it. Recently, I was at a concert. Taking a break from the musical barrage, I ventured into the theater lobby. As I stood in the lobby, I noticed two grrls handing a 'zine to another girl, asking if she had seen it. I approached the two and told them I hadn't seen their 'zine. "Well, it's a grrl 'zine," came the reply. "What's this? Whaddya sexist?" "Well, I mean, it's grrl issues, you probably wouldn't be interested." "I'm interested in all issues." They gave me a copy of "Super Ninja Girl" and we parted. As I walked with my new 'zine, I thought about what they said. I knew they had a target audience, and probably weren't trying to be sexist, but I couldn't get over it. It's about grrl issues, so I wouldn't be interested? Why wouldn't I be interested? What would I be interested in? Why do they have a preconceived perception of me based on my male status? Who do these people think I am? Are my hands those of the man who beat you and your mother? Does my mouth speak words of the overweight klansman? It's quite the contrary, but how can I inform them of this before they make up their own minds? I can't. Later on, during that concert, I had an in depth discussion with the two grrls. It seems that the first words they spoke to me were a "Freudian slip" of sorts. They explained that they weren't trying to be discriminate, but that it was more of a protection for them, because when most people think of a riot grrl, it's usually not in a good light. After talking to them, I gained a little more respect for their passion and devotion, but was not impressed with the fact that for a little security, they would sacrifice the ideals they are supposedly trying to uphold in their quest for "equality." I don't condone anything done out of discrimination. Even though people with the same "white" male status as I have fucked many people over because of their discrimination-dominant mindset, it lends no validity to others' perceptions of me based on that status. Even though one may feel the desire for reparations is justified, a perception of an individual based on unjustified stereotypes is transgressive and hypocritical. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (5) - FIGHT - by Mercuri Fact: Three out of Three people die. Fact: Two point Nine out of Three people never do anything worth mentioning. It's true, everybody dies. Sure, George Burns had us hopeful there for a few years, but now he's dead too. Most people have this crazy notion that living longer and doing nothing is better than dying for something you believe in. "The reasonable man accommodates himself to the ways of the world. The unreasonable man attempts to get the world to accommodate itself to his ways. Progress depends on unreasonable men. - G. B. Shaw Fight. You'll get plenty of rest when you're dead. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- (6) - "The Skirt Incident" - by Edicius The two boys fixed their gazes straight across the cafeteria on a site no normal 15 year old guy would pass up. Drew was carelessly taking the can from the soda machine; bending over at the waist is not a good thing when you're wearing a short skirt. The boys waited for a sight like this, hopefully catching a glimpse of her underwear in the four seconds before she straightened herself up again and walked to the cheerleader table. "Man, don't you just want a piece of that? I know I do," Brian said to his friend Jeff, while keeping an eye on Drew's walk across the cafeteria room floor. With her sultry walk, and the way she swung her hips in a truly erotic fashion, girls like that should be illegal. She did the same thing every day. Either bending over to pick up her Diet Coke can from the big red machine or bending over to pick up a small item that she displaced. Then, during the course of the thirty minute lunch, she would do her little sultry walk, and ask for money from guys. With an ass like that, almost everyone gave her money; and lots of it. Making ten bucks in thirty minutes wasn't uncommon for her. She knew what she had, and she used them to her fullest advantage. Sending that whole feminist movement back a couple'a dozen years. Jeff looked into space as he ate his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. A glob of jelly fell out of the side, and made a "plop" sound as it landed. "So, uh. Did you and Lisa do anything this weekend?" Brian had a way of slipping things pertaining to sex into their everyday conversations. "Umm. We hooked up, and I felt her up. That was about it, I guess." "You're getting cheated, you know that?" "What do you mean?" "You've been going with her for two months, and she hasn't gone down on you once? Man, that's lame. I heard she fucked Gramn Morris, and she's given you like, uh, two handjobs? Again I reiterate the fact, you're getting cheated." "I wish I lived in your world." "Are you patronizing me?" "Uh-huh," Jeff said with a total "you're stupid"-patronizing voice. He just didn't understand Brian at times. Brian thinks he is a gift to women. He's had sex a few times, and never had any problems finding a date. So, he thought that everyone's relationships should be like his: short, meaningless, and a lot of sex. "I don't want _your_ types of relationships, Bri. You and I are different people, even though we're good friends. What you want in a girl, and what I want in a girl, is totally different." "What do _you_ want in a girl?" "I want someone I can love. I don't care about anything sexual related. I want someone to be there for me, someone I can be there for. I want someone who's beautiful and fucking real." "Down By Law, 'Ivory Girl'. Good song." "Don't fuckin' change the topic on me. I'll quote song lyrics if I want to." Brian laughed, "I love it when you get all flustered like this. Now you're going to disdain me because I get pussy and you don't. You have such a holier-then-thou attitude about sex, it's so unbelievable." "So, when I find a 'real' girlfriend, and start getting some, then I should come back to you and tell you how good it is?" "Exactly." "Dude, you fuckin' irritate me. When you get a REAL girlfriend, and you know what it is like to love someone, then you come back to me and talk to me. Otherwise, fuck off." Jeff proceded to get up, and throw his lunch away. Instead of turning around and sitting back down with Brian, he went and sat down with some kids he kinda knew. Brian, sitting in a sea of self-pity, decided that he didn't really care what Jeff had to say anymore. He was tired of his condescending bullshit anyway. He got up, and proudly marched to that table full of cheerleader chicks, and stood right behind Drew. "Uh. Hi, Drew. Um, like. My name's Brian, would you like to go out sometime?" The table laughed in unison. "Go sit down, Freshman boy." The bell rang, and the vice-principal shouted, "ok, everybody up. Throw your trash away and get to your lockers." ------ The following Friday was the Spring Dance. Jeff was eager to be going with Lisa, for he knew it would be such a special night. She picked him up around 6:40, and they went to the dance. He hadn't talked to Brian in over a week, since the day they had their cafeteria discussion. But, as usual, Brian was there with some decent looking slut-girl. "Why haven't you talked to Bri lately? You never told me," Lisa inquired. "Well, don't worry about it." "I want to worry about it. You two have been good friends, and I don't understand why something would come between you. It wasn't me, was it?" "Uh, not really." "Not really?" "Well. Not really. I'll tell you later, dear," he said with a quick kiss to her lips. She shrugged it off, and forgot about it after a few quick dances. During one of the slow songs, near the end of the dance, Jeff looked over and saw that Brian had his hands all over slut-girl. He looked down, and looked at Lisa, and remarked to himself how beautiful she looked. Her long black hair looked better then ever tonight. She smelled better then ever, something of a mixture between Eternity and CK1. She put her head on his shoulder, and he nuzzled her hair with his nose. At the end of the song, he looked over to see what Brian was doing. He caught a parting glance of him as he walked out of the door. "Probably going to get fucked," he thought. With all the bad he would say about him, Jeff did kind of envy Brian. He went around from girl to girl with no qualms. He had sex a bunch of times, and was never modest about it. Actually, it was between modesty and bragging, whenever he got a good chance, he would rub it in anyone's face whom he'd had more sex then. Another slow song started up, and Lisa hugged him firmly. He looked down at her again, and looked at her again. She was so beautiful. He loved her so much. He hair was tied back with a red ribbon, and she wore a light pink lipstick. Combined with her dark eyes, she was the most awesome looking girl that he'd ever been out with. A few more sips of punch and a dozen songs later, the chaperons of the dance were quickly ushering everyone out. When the dance ends, you better high-tail your ass out of there. "Stuck up assholes", Jeff thought. Lisa and Jeff sat down in her car, and got ready to go home. The radio popped on, and Jeff was quick to turn off the neo-industrial crap that the local station was spewing out. "So, uh. Wanna go to a diner or something, Leese?" "Sure." ----- They ate, and then started home. Suddenly, only a few blocks before his house, she turned the Nissan Sentra off of the main road onto some rural side street. "What time do you have to be home, Jay?" "No time, really. Why's that?" "Well, I've been looking for the perfect time to give you something," she said with a grin. She reached over, and passionately kissed him on the lips, and then on the check, and then on neck. In only a few minutes, she reached down and slowly unzipped his pants. ----- The next Monday at school, Jeff saw Brian for the first time since the dance. Normally, he would have told Brian all about how Lisa went down on him, but they weren't on normal terms anymore. So, he said fuck it. "He doesn't care about me," Jeff thought. ----- A month or two later, and a couple of handjobs and blowjobs later, Lisa's parents were going to Atlantic City for the weekend. Jeff snuck over there one night, and they were fooling around, and before he knew it, she was on top of him, totally naked. They fucked & sucked and kissed & cuddled, but it didn't matter what they did anymore. He was never closer to anyone as he was to this girl right now. It didn't matter what Brian said, or what they did, he knew they were going to be together for a long time. The next week, they broke up. The night before they fucked, Lisa fucked Gramn Morris in his car. It turned out that Gramn only fucked her to get back at Drew, he fucked some kid from another school that nobody knew. "Sex is evil." ----- The first day of the next school year, Brian sat down right next to Jeff. Just like old times. Forgetting the months & months that had passed since they last talked, Brian asked, "Hey buddy, how was your Summer?" "Eh, alright. Lisa and I broke up. What about yourself?" "Ouch, that sucks. Oh, I've been going out with Kelly. You have to meet her. She's awesome." Remembering old times, and figuring she was another one of Brian's month-long relationships, Jeff asked, "how long have you two been going out?" "Don't be an asshole. I've changed the way I view girls because of this girl. We've been going out since like, May. I took her to the Spring Dance." -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (7) - The All But Kung-Fu Class - by Ben Ohmart The boy wasn't into cars because magazines were a couple dollars and the only thing they'd ever had was the old big green car. It was the old big green car to him; pulling him to Stanton's every week, their only trip. She'd get out while still putting on make-up because she enjoyed having something to do with every minute of her day. It was a good thing, because she had a full-time job and also took nights at a bar no one would think of looking for her in for tips, draped usually and fully in the failing purple housecoat that got the sides taken off every time before public trips. The trick was pulling just the right thread. The thick orange thread that stood out so that she'd get the right loop, and the sides, the pieces around the neck, would fall off quite easily. Then it certainly looked like something you could wear in public. The best thing was the ride underneath the cart, where the dog food would go. No dog, so he was safe for every journey. The world was a different place under here. There was no above. There was only the land of cheap cereals and heavy rice sacks and the big bottles of alcohol and sauces that were still blocking up the shelves, a green pepper and Super Mushroom paradise in which the bar codes blurred and prices merged into just a single black dot for a change. Whenever they stopped for a moment, the boy wouldn't think of the two reasons they would ever stop: coupon or sale item. It was the way he was delivered. Not to mention her delivery. "Oh no! What's this? Where are we?", Mom would say, and the boy would smile a concern. "Hmmm... I don't like the look of this. This is.... oh no!" The boy would look out, imagine the gun in his hand. He couldn't imagine the bullets. But the threat was out there, and soon they'd be moving onto another location. One involving pastas and greater dangers. "This doesn't look like the place to me," she'd say. "Look at the directions again. It's dark around here." The buggy moved. "What's that?!" The boy looked. Could see nothing. But not because it wasn't there. "I want you to keep a look-out. A careful, careful - oh no!" Suddenly there was a 32 year old sound effect, and the boy gave his own kind of swishing sound to the fight. Customers looked and let them go, but the aging manager and youngish women poking cans into vacant lots were too used to the sight. Not to mention the wobble. She could always blame it on the cart. Wheels. But it was the one consolation she had in life. Her boy was too important to be called a consolation. Certainly a prize, but not a - her breath was all right, and she could hardly be scolded for spending the child's college fund on it. (Not there Was a college fund.) But everything she got and consumed was a freebie at the bar. She'd refuse the on duty drinks, but the owner of the place felt sorry for her. Gave her the stuff to take home. She took it as pure friendship. There was no reason to feel guilty about any of it. It did keep her head pounding though. Sound effects were a last resort. Still, the boy expected them. She knew that. She couldn't give him much, but she could give him that. Throw away newspapers were his book covers that came off in the rain; the imagination and a set that brought in a single channel when plugged in; dime books the library didn't want anymore; memories of that one trip to Washington DC that year; he was pleased with what he had. Coupons later, mom was struggling to fit the cart through the door that always opened for her, but for which she always giggled, and the boy carried any excess. Most of the time there was no excess - but he'd carry all the bags. It made the buggy lighter and mom could conserve a little strength. Didn't take much strength, but they both knew it added up. He'd unlock the driver's side, and while she got in, he would unlock his own, load up the car, and still she'd be on their adventure. Some days there were pirates in the parking lot. If it was cloudy, she'd look up and show her kid the fleet of Russian planes that were up there, blaring down, ready to kill. He would protect her. She'd point. Another! Point. He was quick with the draw! It didn't last long, the years, which slowly drove her to a safe plot of ground. The boy did as was shown. The same rented house, since it always cost too much to move. A part time job at a plant store, the rest dealing with delivering papers that brought tin the power, water and now and then hair cut. Drinks weren't free, but then he didn't have to worry about car insurance or car. He'd take his dates to the grocery store. But none of them "got it". No one made the sounds. He would drink, then offer, then drink. But no one loved it as much as he did. No woman had his mother's liver. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (8) - Poetry - various writers sharon b. smith - by Eerie please wait till i'm outta the room before you start screaming breathing hard your immense self-induced joy i don't want to witness bedsheets alcohol bad porn movie soundtracks there is so little place your loneliness takes it all i hate when your lies are opened i hate when you throw me back into living state i've been lying down so long trying to never dream keeping my ass on the damn floor can't help moving can't help getting all your cold glances i know you don't know who i am I HATE BEING HERE BELIEVE ME I HATE IT ----- new jersey - by Eerie reloaded dry & obscene white dust naked colors bad trip out of hallucinogens i'm dying of awareness yet i'm flying all over you last couple miles of concrete before penn station center of the known universe the sun strikes it's as cold as cold could be ----- new york - by Eerie then back where i belong antarctica where everything is constant & predictable where my landscape doesn't hurt my eyes flat white pains yet it feels warmer than it used to smoke filling the room two tracks of pcp no need for sex in my room numbness is no annoyance ----- Corporal Punishment - by Christopher Stolle stand up point out the instigator put them on trial select a jury appoint a judge make the defendant walk in with a brown paper bag over his head handcuffs around his wrists make him spill his guts or we'll pull the lever and do it for him ----- Crisp, Aromatic, But At a Loss - by Christopher Stolle run down the road with a ball-point pen in your hand, to form a signature mark. rain drops from your face flowing through the lines on your face drying the wrinkles. no vanishing cream to alleviate the scars of disproportionate follies that you once saw from a vagabond train. silent waters never calm the soul nor quench the thirst for words. ----- Together in the Wire - by Spinsane "I can feel my innards slipping away, through my fingertips... And I gasp for air, through the smoke of the calming lady's kiss- Whos breath it tastes of mustard seeds draining down my throat." "Well, my friend, the bugle calls and my body starts to bloat- Bursting all the rusted buttons on my once trim uniform. Together we shall lay comrade, as lovers she has scorned. "On a sea of broken bones we float mariners in a squall And the sweet song of our soldier's pride has lost its Sirens' Call." -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (9) - Reviews, reviews, and more reviews - by Edicius -- Concerts -- The Warped Tour / August 4 - Stone Pony, Asbury Park, NJ Great bands, punks, skateboards, expensive water, and Epitath Records. That's all you saw, or so it seemed, when you traversed the grounds of the Stone Pony Festival Area during this year's Vans Warped Tour. A great lineup was in store for a long day of music, skateboarders, and other assorted sideshows. Besides the great lineup, which included the Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Civ, Nofx, Pennywise, Rocket From The Crypt, Red-5, Down by Law, and more, you had professional skateboarders and bmx'ers, plus the EA Sports booth (which allowed you to play various Sega Genesis, Ninetendo, and Sony Playstation games that they produce). You also had signup booths from different organizations, including the Surfrider Foundation. Now, to the music. The way they scheduled the bands, they had them playing roughly 30 minute sets. So, when one band would finish one the main stage, there would be a few minute downtime, and another band would then start playing on the second stage. This way, you caught most of all the bands. I'll talk about the bands that I liked the most. The first band that I saw that I liked was the Suicide Machines. This band plays a mixture of ska & punk, but they did some impressive covers. Including a cover of Minor Threat's "Out of Step" and House of Pain's "Jump Around." Otherwise, I don't remember many of their other song's names. They were pretty good, though. Then, I caught one of the bands that I really wanted to see, Red-5. I saw them last year, and I was really impressed then. But, this time around, they were even better. They played songs from their Interscope Records debut, _Flash_, including "Space", "Turn It On", and "Making Waves on a Future Ocean." Down by Law was, along with Civ, my favorite set of the day. They blasted through their songs from their new release, _All Scratched Up_. They awed the crowd with their rendition of The Proclaimers' "500 Miles", and they got the crowd moving with songs like "Radio Ragga" and "Gruesome Gary." They played their music, got the crowd moving, and had a great time. By far, the ones I was most impressed with. Rocket from the Crypt thoroughly impressed me as well. This six member band churns up a hardcore beat like no one else does. They implement a trombone and trumpet to their hardcore rythym to give them a very subtle ska-ish sound. They had the ground jumping during "On A Rope", and had everyone dancing while they played "Young Livers" and "Born In '69." I loved their outfits that day; silver-sequence bowling shirts. After RFTC, I hurried myself over to the main stage to catch Civ. Including this show, I've caught Civ 4 of the last 5 times they've come to my area. They've always put on a great show, and they didn't let the crowd down with this performance. The four piece NYHC band played with all their might, and made sure the crowd was dancing and having a good time. They played an incredible rendition of their song "Set Your Goals" by borrowing the horn section from RFTC. They had the crowd begging for more by playing "Can't Wait One Minute More", "United Kids", and "Et Tu Brute?" flawlessly. They did not let down a single person who came to this show to see them. I hung around and watched the skateboarders and got some water after this. I happened to catch part of Dance Hall Crasher's set. This ska band was very good, and I was really impressed by what I saw of them. I'm upset that I only saw two or three of their songs, and hopefully they'll come back. I also missed NOFX, but I didn't really care too much about them, and Blink 182 was pretty good. Pennywise played this show when they weren't really supposed to. They had originally cancelled the show due to the death of a close friend and former member of the band, but decided to play at the last minute. This was great news to a large part of the crowd, who were obviously big fans of Pennywise. Pennywise played a very energetic set, considering the circumstances, and the crowd was pleased. They did a very unique version of B.B. King's "Stand by Me." Another band that had a lot of fans at the show was the Mighty Mighty Bosstones. They had the crowd dancing and jumping to their ska-core beat, playing the songs that they've made big over the years that they've been together. Included in this set were "Someday I Suppose", numerous songs from _Question the Answers_, and they ended off with a strong version of "Holy Smoke." Dicky Barret of MMB summed it up the best when he said, "We played a different tour last summer [Lollapalooza], and now we know that this is the real tour." I think everyone at this show would agree with that statement. ----- Goldfinger/Dog Eat Dog / August 20 - Stone Pony, Asbury Park, NJ This was originally supposed to be a show with No Doubt, but due sickness to No Doubt lead singer, Gwen Stefani, No Doubt was forced to cancel. Instead of coming all the way to New Jersey and not playing, Goldfinger and Dog Eat Dog decided to play a free show. This was an amazingly great show. The club was packed, there was little room to move around once inside. The fact that this was a free show attracted a really mixed crowd of different musical genres. You had punks, you had skinheads, you had rudeboys & girls, and you had alternateens. None of these people went home upset, though. Dog Eat Dog was a band that a lot of people came for. They're a mixture of musical styles, including hardcore, funk, and ska. This band, named MTV Europe's 1995 Breakthrough Artist of the Year, is also semi-local; hailing from Northern New Jersey. So, many of the people here have been able to follow their career from the start. They did not let the crowd down, playing a good mixture of songs both old and new. After Dog Eat Dog, a surprising amount of the crowd left. As I said, a lot of the crowd was there for Dog Eat Dog only. Those who left, however, missed a great performance by this Californian punk-ska band. Goldfinger kept the crowd moving as fast as they could by pumping out the songs from their largely popular self-titled debut album. Including, "Answers", "Miles Away", and the hugely successful hit song, "Here In Your Bedroom." They danced on stage, crowd surfed with the fans, and had a great time. A fan was selected to sing Operation Ivy's "Smiling", and for a 16 year old kid, he did a great job. While the fan sang, lead singer John Feldman crowd surfed and bonded with fans. The two song encore included their second huge hit, "Mable" and "How Deep Is Your Love?" Afterwords, the guys from the band were kind enough to hang around and talk to the fans that lingered outside the club. I was lucky enough to get a Jonas sticker autographed by three of the members (Darren, Charlie, and John). They were all very cool guys, talking to everyone and just having a good time and thanking them for coming. For a free show, it was spectacular. Goldfinger put on an amazing performance this night. -- CDs/LPs -- The Favorite Color / Color Out Of Space / Ohio Records This is one of the best sounding CDs I've heard in a while. Great pop music that begs for big-time acclaim. The music presented on their debut is far from what would be considered alternative, though this is a pleasant sounding alternative to the mainstream. Instead of concentrating on strong guitar riffs and fast vocals, they calm the tempo down with mid-temp riffs and strong lead vocals. Lead singer Tris McCall's vocals are solid at the forefront of this great band. Backing members, drummer Tom Snow, keyboardist, Steve "Matrix" Matrick and bassist Martin Severin add a dynamic sound to The Favorite Color. Variation is the key here. Instead of one sound that doesn't change throughout the album, the sound changes and flows throughout the span of the CD. Their music transcends a variety of musical styles, while their lyrics go through the lives of a variety of common people. They open up the album with a strong song, "Stereo." According to lead singer Tris McCall, "the white-collar worker in 'Stereo has become an object; in order to get his job, he has sacrificed the possibility of risk and change." Racism is talked about in "Go Back To West New York", a man looks at all the women he could never have in "V. In Love", and in "Valis" another office worker loses his faith in God due to the routine of his job. Overall, this is a very fantastic album from The Favorite Color. They bring a series of different musical genres together to form one great and unique style. Grade: A+ (Contact: Ohio Records, 48th Street #2, Weehawken, NJ 07807) ----- Plastic Mikey / Cook Up Something New Plastic Mikey is a 5 piece jazz/rock band from the Chicago area. They combine their influences (The grateful Dead, Jefferson Airplane, The Clash, Ornette Coleman) into music that is "modern but not trendy." The vocals are strong and the music is a very good mix of jazz and rock. They don't center the band around one specific instrument. Instead, they use a great mixture of guitar, keyboards, saxophone, and drums. The percussion and bass play an important role in this album. All the tracks on here display a very diverse group of musicians. Songs like "A-Bomb" and "Cook Up Something New" define the upbeat nature of this band, while "Blows: Past Tense" gives the band more of a blues/jazz edge. The only track that is sub-par on this album is an over-extended instrumental by the name of "Dance of the Clay People." It's a lengthy composition, and they have too many solos for one song. Otherwise, this is a very fine debut album from a good jazz/rock band. I can pick up some early-Billy Joel-esque piano playing on this album, especially in the beginning of "Cook Up Something New." This band is going places. Grade: B+ (Contact: Plastic Mikey, 7100 W. 166th St. #3B, Tinley Park, IL 60477) -- Demos/EPs -- Cathexis / Naive This is a band that is hard to classify, it ranges through a few musical styles. The band's musical influences range from punk and ska, to industrial and goth. With all these influences, it's a wonder how they settled on a industrial-edge sound. This demo is really good, with a clean-industrial sound, mixed with some goth. Songs such as "Steel Wool", "Naive", and "Nomtv" are just really good. There is no way around it. This is a really good band; but as of this writing they are on hiatus due to some of the members going away to college. I hope they don't mess up a good thing here, I wouldn't mind hearing new stuff from them in the future. -- 'Zines -- Hardware Fanzine (#8 Spring '96, 8 1/2 x 11, 70 pgs., $1.50 ppd.) This is a 'zine for and about the hardcore music scene. Good interviews with Ignite, Floorpunch, 97a, Ensign, and Pushead. Amazingly great articles about the NJHC scene, including an article called "Jersey's Unheard Music" which traces the history of bands such as Sand in the Face and Mental Abuse. Scene reports from around the world (Philippines has a hardcore scene?), short, personal (notably, editor Dave Koenig's experience with the Internet, and different reflections on shows he and co-editor Brett Beach have attended), and a slew of record and 'zine reviews round out this issue. (David Koenig 120 Coolidge Street 2nd Floor Linden, N.J. 07036-4302) ----- Weezine (#7 Summer '96, 8 1/2 x 5 1/2) Another amazing issue of Weezine from Mykel and Carli, the great people who run the Weezer Fan Club. Being that the new Weezer album, _Pinkerton_ is scheduled for release on September 24, this issue is chock full of great information about the album. Rivers Cuomo writes another letter and tells everyone whats going on with his leg brace, the new album, and school. Brian Bell talks about the day he gave a guitar lesson to a boy who is sick with lukemia, and how it was a great experience for him. There's a rundown of a LA Area Weezer Fan Meet, which included an appearance by Rivers and Brian. Plus, Karl Koch answers many many more questions from fans of the band, and he gives a complete list of every single Weezer item (t-shirts, hats, stickers, et al) ever made. Overall, another great issue from Mykel and Carli, and as before, you can only get this by joining the Weezer Fan Club. (to join the Fan Club, send a SASE to Weezer Fanclub, 9311 SE Foster Rd. #666, Portland, OR 97266-4646) -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tom would like to thank the following people, bands, and/or organizations for their help or contributions to this issue of Jonas, Belial (even though you don't do ANYTHING), Mindcrime, Dimes, Grey Hawk, Oodles, Spiff, tMM, Kojak, Tut, Mercuri, Jestapher, Eightball, Big Hurt, Eerie, Ben Ohmart, Chris Stolle, Lucifer, Trip, Misfit, Jon Vena, WHTG-FM Melanie Franklin and The New Museum, The Favorite Color and Ohio Records, Plastic Mikey, Cathexis, and everyone else who puts up with me long enough to have an intellegent conversation. I thank you all. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jonas e'Zine -- Issue 21 (Volume 2, Issue 6) send all questions, comments, or submissions to edi@cybercomm.net visit the web site, http://www.cybercomm.net/~edi/jonas.html visit Tom's web site, http://www.cybercomm.net/~edi/ if you've read it this far, you get a cookie! email Tom Sullivan/Edicius at edi@cybercomm.net email Belial at belial@cybercomm.net visit hot young girls, http://www.nyphette.com Jonas: It's more than a 'zine, it's a lifestyle. --------------------------------+ e o f +---------------------------------