___ ___ ___ /\ \ /\ \ /\__\ the glorious hogs of entropy \:\ \ /::\ \ /:/ _/_ present unto you \:\ \ /:/\:\ \ /:/ /\__\ issue #174 ___ /::\ \ /:/ \:\ \ /:/ /:/ _/_ /\ /:/\:\__\ /:/__/ \:\__\ /:/_/:/ /\__\ >> "Barbeque, I Don't Like You" << \:\/:/ \/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ /:/ / by -> Phorce \::/__/ \:\ /:/ / \::/_/:/ / n \:\ \ o \:\/:/ / \:\/:/ / t oink you, pal. \:\__\ g \::/ / f \::/ / r \/__/ s \/__/ \/__/ o p y ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- okay, so here goes: so, a duck and a barbeque walk into a bar, and the bitch duck (who's a female) shouts, after a heated argument, "barbeque, i don't like you." the barbeque is so charmed by this unintentional rhyme that he turns it into a pop ditty that takes the country by storm. the barbeque and the duck team up under the name "barbequed duck" and sign a big deal with polygram. but what's wrong? they lack inspiration. simply put, they have no talent. the song "barbeque, i don't like you" may have been amazing, but since then the duck and the barbeque have been having problems recreating the creative process which produced the first song. they try everything. they visit almost every bar they see, hoping to reproduce that first moment of inspiration that spawned their first song. they pick fights over everything; from the subtleties of apparel choices to the grand disputes of political ideology. but they fail. why? because BARBEQUES AND DUCKS CAN'T REALLY SING AND THE DUCK WAS A BITCH ANYWAY AND THE FIRST SONG WASN'T REALLY THAT GOOD REALLY AND THE BARBEQUE DIDN'T REALLY HAVE ANY TALENT IN THE FIRST PLACE. STUPID ASSES. I HOPE THEY LEARNED THEIR FUCKING LESSON. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- * (c) HoE publications. HoE #174 -- written by phorce -- 12/30/97 *