

                                    _

                                   | \

                                   |  \

                                   | | \

                            __     | |\ \             __

      _____________       _/_/     | | \ \          _/_/     _____________

     |  ___________     _/_/       | |  \ \       _/_/       ___________  |

     | |              _/_/_____    | |   > >    _/_/_____               | |

     | |             /________/    | |  / /    /________/               | |

     | |                           | | / /                              | |

     | |                           | |/ /                               | |

     | |                           | | /                                | |

     | |                           |  /                                 | |

     | |                           |_/                                  | |

     | |                                                                | |

     | |      c   o   m   m   u   n   i   c   a   t   i   o   n   s     | |

     | |________________________________________________________________| |

     |____________________________________________________________________|



  ...presents...                Bob Takes a Trip

                                                         by Special Agent

                                                            Finerty



                      >>> a cDc publication.......1994 <<<

                        -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-

  ____       _     ____       _       ____       _     ____       _       ____

 |____digital_media____digital_culture____digital_media____digital_culture____|



     "There are times when a man has to be alone.  Sometimes you just have to

take off and get in touch with yourself and with the part of you that is deep

and introspective."



     Those words played over and over in his head like a record with a bad

scratch.  He knew he was right though.  He really did need to take a break.

Hell, he'd been on the project only three months and already he had enough data

for two papers.  "Yeah," he thought, "I guess I deserve a break."  That's where

he found himself as he shoved his tooth brush into the duffel bag.  Bob was

taking a vacation.  His first, and to Disneyland to boot.  He'd heard all

about the insane rides and the throngs of people.  He knew he could lose

himself there, knew that no one would notice that he never talked to anyone

else and always ate alone.  Indeed, he knew he could get in touch with himself

there.  Bob was never the type of kid to play in the woods or even play outside

much.  He preferred to sit and read or watch TV.  As far as he was concerned,

this trip to Disneyland was a trip into nature, into the real world, a world

where Bob had never felt entirely comfortable.  It's hard to feel normal in

such a place when you're a two foot high, dysfunctional mechanical dog.



     At Disneyland, he would fit right in.  Most likely people would just think

he was one of the attractions.  He knew they never talked so he could just keep

to himself and think.  Of course, getting there wouldn't be too much fun.  He

had to call a cab and then put himself in one of those large doggie carriers

with a note on top from himself to the cabbie explaining what should be done. 

"Fucking incompetents," was all he could think as the container slammed against

the door of the cab.  He growled at the cabbie for this but he just ignored

Bob.  So Bob gored him right there.  After he had cleaned the blood off

himself, he shoved the driver into the trunk and drove himself to the airport

parking in a desolated area of the garage so no one would see him getting out

of the cab.



     He grabbed all of his crap and walked to the spot where a porter should

show up to help people with their luggage.  Finally a seemingly young college

student type of person showed and read the note Bob had put on the top of the

carrier.  "At least this chick isn't such a fuck like the cabbie," Bob thought.

He didn't like to kill people.  They didn't taste very good for one thing, and

the blood always made a helluva mess on his plaid vest.  After he was loaded

onto the plane, he set his alarm to go off when the plane began losing altitude

and dozed off to dream of Pluto and how he'd really like to teach him what a

real dog would do to Mickey.



     His dream was left unfinished however, when the plane began to descend

just a little early.  Well, actually it was way too early.  They were still

over Nevada.  Five seconds after he woke up, the plane crash-landed into the

sand.  Bob was not happy.  Being stuck in the damned dog carrier was not the

best place to be when you and the luggage are brought to a sudden stop.  As he

flew through the baggage compartment, he thought about the pain he would

inflict upon the pilot if he was still alive.



     Magically, more than half of the passengers survived the crash.  The

survivors, however, took a secret vote and decided they should use Bob to

obtain parts to fix the broken transmitter in the plane.  This was, of course,

a most unfortunate and fatal move on the part of the survivors and they soon

joined the rest of the passengers as carrion.



     Bob was not happy; not only was his last vest bloodied with the juice of a

hundred ignorant humans but he was at least a day behind in his vacation plans.

"Ah fuck it," he said, and proceeded to launch one of his nuclear missiles at

Moscow.  "I'm so sick of this shit," he thought as he walked towards the

nearest mesa.  "Might as well have a good view of the fireworks."

 _______  __________________________________________________________________

/ _   _ \|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Kingdom of Shit.....806/794-1842|

 ((___)) |Cool Beans!..........415/648-PUNK|Polka AE {PW:KILL}..806/794-4362|

 [ x x ] |Metalland Southwest..713/579-2276|ATDT East...........617/350-STIF|

  \   /  |The Works............617/861-8976|Ripco ][............312/528-5020|

  (' ')  |            Save yourself!  Go outside!  DO SOMETHING!            |

   (U)   |==================================================================|

  .ooM   |Copyright (c) 1994 cDc communications and Special Agent Finerty.  |

\_______/|All Rights Reserved.                               11/01/1994-#290|



