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     | |      c   o   m   m   u   n   i   c   a   t   i   o   n   s     | |

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  ...presents...                  Trickledown

                                                         by Josh Whalen



                      >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<<

                        -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc-

_______________________________________________________________________________





     It was about six weeks after I started riding for Blitzkrieg that the

inevitable happened.  I was carrying about three runs, one rush and one

oversize, all going pretty far south, a good twenty-five dollars worth of work,

good money.  It wasn't even noon yet and I was already holding like twelve

tickets, it was turning out to be my best day yet.  I was cutting cross town on

fifty-fourth street, hitting all the lights just as they were turning green, I

was really hellbent.  I came up on fifth avenue, heading west, the light turned

to green just as I entered the cross walk.  I saw a cab blow the intersection

just before I entered it myself, just a few fractions of a second earlier and

we would have tested several laws of physics.  I didn't see the limousine

behind him run the red light on fifth until after it had relieved me of my

front wheel.



     Just like that!  I felt, I don't know, a tug on the front fork.  The next

thing I knew, the whole bike whipped around and slid sideways into the side of

the limousine.  I threw myself back, off the bike, back into the cross walk

when I felt the bike begin to whip, and that was what saved me.  The limousine

fled, only to be caught at the next light by traffic.  I was seething with

adrenaline, boiling mad, like only combat troops ever get, I imagine.  I

grabbed up the wreckage of the bike, threw it over my shoulder, and chased the

limo down on foot.  A crowd had gathered; this was a busy intersection with

lots of pedestrians all rubber-necking the scene.  They'd all seen what

happened.  People in midtown hate bike messengers in general; we come out of

nowhere silently, not like a car with its noisy engine declaring its presence a

block in advance.  We scare them, with our close passing.  "Plenty of room" to

a skilled fix-wheel rider is a hairs' breadth  to some pedestrian investment

trader.  They'd seen what had happened, though, and I'd had the light.  For

once it was obviously not the biker's fault.  They were all yelling as I pulled

out my bike lock, a big horseshoe of hardened steel, and pulled open the

drivers door before he could lock it.  People were shouting, "Do it!" and "He

ran the light!  Don't let him go!  Hold him 'till the cops get here!"  If

there's anything people hate worse than a bike messenger, it's a hit and run

driver.  I was breathing hard and sweat was pouring down my face, I must have

looked like a real berserker.  I held the lock back on one hand like I was

ready to brain the driver with it and thundered at him: "All right, pal, we can

do this one of three ways.  We can sit here blocking traffic and wait for the

cops to show, and for them to lock you up for hit and run and running a red

light, or, I can dismantle you and your car with my lock, or, you can

compensate me right now for my bike and the loss of a day's pay, and I'll just

hail a cab and go home and you can go on your way.  What'll it be?"  He looked

at me with blank eyes for just a moment, but I was all accelerated, my time

sense wound up by several orders of magnitude, it seemed like he took way too

long, so I kicked the side of the car and shrieked, "WELL?"  He reached into

his jacket and took out his wallet, threw its contents on the street, slammed

the door and took off into traffic.  I picked up the money, counted a hundred

and ten dollars.  Someone in the crowd said, "Hey!  He's gettin' away!"  I

smiled and said, "It's alright, he paid me."  I dragged the bike over to the

corner, called in to my dispatcher and told him what had happened.



     The first thing he wanted to know was if the packages were damaged, and I

reassured him they were fine.  Then he asked, "D'you catch the guy?"



     "Yeah," I said.



     "Did he pay you?"



     "Yeah," I said.



     "How much?"



     I told him.



     "Good work," he said, "as long as he paid you."



     I was back on the road bright and early the next day.  The new bike only

cost me fifty bucks, so I figured I came out ahead.



  _   _   _____________________________________________________________________

/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321  Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362

 [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453  The People Farm.......916/673-8412

  \   /  |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194  The Bombay............714/897-0412

  (' ')  |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691  The Works.............617/861-8976

   (U)   |=====================================================================

  .ooM   |1990 cDc communications by Josh Whalen.                 05/17/90-#135

\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away.







