Climbing Phone Poles- Tips and techniques.    By The Mad Phone-man 
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At one time or another, all of us have had to climb a phone pole or two in 
the pursuit of our objective, be it a quick cable connection or a tap on an 
enemys phone. These files are meant to help the novice avoid problems and or 
death.  
First, who are the climbers? They can be divided into 2 categorys, the lineman 
and the Ninja. 
1) The lineman- Dresses like a lineman, down to the tool belt and hard hat.  
Climbs in the daytime and at worst has to fix an occasional bad cable drop for 
some stupid housewife. (This is recommended since it won't cause as 
much attention as having the b****! call the company and complain about the 
snotty repairman...I have had to do it.)2) The Ninja- Climbs poles at night, 
dresses in all black, and often is found either fried or impailed on fences. 
The ninja has never used gaffs till the night he tries to climb a pole and  
proceeds to fall into a yard full of nasty doberman pincers. Once up pole,he 
finds he left tools on ground. 
  
Whats up there. 
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Starting from the ground up the lines are aranged as follows: 
First and closest to ground- Cable TV, recognized by open connections of coax 
type cable to metal boxes out in open. 
Next up is Phone- Connections are made in plastic or metal boxes. Connections 
are usualy not exposed to enviroment. 
Next up comes the first of the dangerous stuff, 110/220 house service. This is 
 the first of POWER and can kill you. You can get zapped by comming in touch 
with any frayed cable and the phone cable, the cable TV line or the ground 
in the triplex service drop, all which are very well grounded for lightning 
protection. A shock of this voltage may or may not kill you, but you will have 
a long time to contemplate your Karma as your broken bones mend after the fall 
to the parking lot below! 
Above this is the first of the guarenteed lethal stuff, Industrial 
 distribution, from 208 to 480 volts. They might look like 110/220 but they 
will have 4 wires as opposed to 3 for the lesser voltages. 
Lastly on the top- (where smart folks put the bad stuff) is the "High lines" 
these vary from 4.8 to 13.5 Kilovolts, they are instant DEATH if even casualy 
brushed, you will be SMOKING CHARRED REMAINS, and the fire department will 
 probibaly remove your remains in the morning after the power crews turn offthe 
juice. I have seen a kid fried by 110,000 volts and he looked like a blackened 
 
tortilla chip. 
  
Some other hazzards up there: 
 Kissing the pole- If you have gaffs, practice with them, period! Keep them 
 sharp and remember you are trusting your life to those small spikes. If you 
gaff out at say 30' its like kissing a buzz saw sliding down the pole. In case 
you havent looked at a pole lately, every time someone climbs it with gaffs 
they create little splinters pointing up to puncture a faller. Of course theres 
 also "free fall", which is nice to think about as the bone doctor removes 
 your knees from under your chin. A freefall bellyflop causes all sorts of 
 nice internal injurys, providing you are found before the shock of hitting  
the ground kills you. 
Some misc. Injurys- 
 I have seen a guys bicep ripped off and dangling from hitting a step peg in a 
 free fall. Real impressive cuts can be had from nails, staples, and metal 
signs sticking out of poles. And theres always the pack of doberman pincers you 
didn't see when you went up, but are there licking their chops after you get 
up there. Also consider that a lot of linemen are shot in getto neighborhoods 
as the monkeys think they are there to disconnect their illegal cable hookup! 
  
So what am I saying? If you got to climb a pole, do it right. Use the proper 
 equipment and by all means, practice before you go up alone in the dark at 
3AM. Borrow a belt, get familiar with the use of gaffs, and wear gloves. 
  
Lets be careful out there! 
  
TMPM 
