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                       Hello! And WELCOME to the LATEST "Zillafile"(tm)
A "Your Brain on Drugs Production".

And here we GO... another adventure with americas FAVORITE pot smoking modem
geek with a bad attitude, Godzilla!  I know if you have ever read any of my
other files that you are expecting it.. so here it goes...

THIS FILE IS MADE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY <uh huh..> AND IS MEANT TO BE
EDUCATIONAL... JUST CAUSE THE SHIT LISTED WORKS, YOU DON'T HAVE TO TRY IT...
There, now MY ass is covered...  This will sound bad, but at the time im
writing this, i suffer from terror blok... similar to writers block.. im just
hitting in keys in hopes of coming up with a nifty and interesting for this
"Zillafile"(tm).. one that you will both adore and cherish.. something to
remember me by... < no, this isnt the last one, by ANY means>... I got it..
stuff that is easy to steal that noone really ever steals because it sounds too
stupid to steal... Yeah.. thats it... i like it... yaknow the stuff.. stuff
that costs not alot, that you would feel stupid going to jail for, but you buy
without thinking.. I'm gonna aim this more towards people out on there own,
not the younger folk... Anyway... i might add something on to the end, so im
glad you D/l'ed this from somewhere.. and AWAY we go... Besides.. even if you
DONT do anything listed.. at least im entertaining you for a few minutes before
you delete this offa yer HD or transfer it all over the place to help yer
ratio.. whatever..

HOW TO STEAL USEFUL THINGS WITH ALMOST NO RISK...

MORE SPECIFICALLY, A LIST OF THINGS THAT YOU CAN STEAL AND WHERE TO GET THE
THINGS...

Ever need light bulbs and are too cheap to spend $2 on a 3 pack? Go rip em offa
peoples front porches.. of abandoned houses.. people rarely take the outdoor
lightbulbs, and it beats buying them..

Do you own a car? Ever have a headlight burn out? Dont wanna spend 8-15$ on a
new one? Go steal one! i have found that the best place to do this is at a gas
station with a repair bay that is closed <The gas station>... there are usually
cars out front that are NOT in easy view, and you can easily sneak in and out
with a headlight.. just remember that there are only about like 4 sizes, so yer
bound to get it right.. go to a Auto store and make yerrself familiar with em..

Ya want a full size spare with a new tire? Depending on yer car, you can go to
a closed dealer, jack up a NEW car, take the wheel, and leave the car on a
cinder block... WALA... insta fix a flat.. literally...  Anyway, car lots
RARELY have security on em, and cops dont bother themselves.. Really...

Want a peice of candy? Ever see those things that say "Put in $.25 for a candy"
for charity, and noones around? Whats stopping you from grabbing a handful? Why
not? Who the hell cares?

does yer car need windshield wipers? Go to a parking lot and get some! Once
again, ANOTHER valuble item you can get at a closed car dealer... Beats paying
the $5 for new ones, doesnt it?

Ever got a love partner ready to let you stick yer wick into her sweet velvet?
She is ready for it, and yer ready... and you realize "Shit! Forgot to buy
rubbers!!" well, if ya got some saran wrap in the pantry, ya got a rubber..
simply double wrap yer rascal, and pork away!!.. it works for me when i ferget
to buy em..

ever wanted to REALLY beat the hell out of someone for NO real reason other
than the "Experiance"? I mean literally baseball bat a guy into
unconciousnes?<sp> .. well, heres what you do.. Go to a shitty neighborhood..
like a downtown area.. find out where the bums sleep.. find one alone... and
beat him up.. if ya wanna ad a sick twist, tell him its a stickup.. homeless
people dont carry guns.. why WOULD they? they would rather have a nice cold
bottle of MD 20/20...

need shoelaces? go to a "Help yerself" shoe store, like Fayva, and simply
switch laces with a "floor model"... grin.. thats a couple bux saved right
there...

How would you like all the major cereal companies sendng you free coupons for
free boxes of cereal? i mean i know I like my froot loops... Especially when
there free... simply send a letter to the company with some horror story of a
bug in the box or some other gross thing.. youll get a letter of apologie plus
a coupon or two for a FREE BIG BOX of a cereal.. Yum..

=============================================================================

OK.. now that i have racked my brain on THAT subject, and i realize that it
isnt BIG enuff for its own file, im gonna fill the rest with abstract
thoughts... VERY abstract.. just follow along and be entertained, Dammit..

Smoking banana peels is a farce..

Kids, your dick DOESNT really get bigger every time you fuck..

No, there ISNt a santa claus, a Tooth fairy, or a Easter bunny.. Also,
evolution isnt a lie, and the world is shaped like a burrito.

Any conveiniance store that advertises "Cold Beer""Cigarettes""Newstand" in
their front window, is expensive as all git out.

Dont eat yellow snow...

God made Weed, Man made booze, who do YOU trust..

2 out of 3 street drug dealers dont sell weed... most of em are crack.. See?
Countrys going to hell in a bucket.. Cant even get weed anymore..

If you have a pet snake, dont feed it birds, it will give the snake a bad case
of the shits..

Dont call the Crypt BBS... It is Gross Buckets.. if you dont have the #, good.
if you do, forget it... Its THAT BAD... like dying via a Acid enema... Yep..
aint that terrible..

Mopeds are like fat women.. there both fun to ride till yer freinds catch
you...

Want a cheap cure for athletes foot? This sounds bad, but it works.. Pee on yer
foot in the shower every day. the ammonia kills it..

Want to blow the minds of the Jehova's Witnesses that come knockng on yer door?
Simply answer it naked, with a hard on, and look over yer shoulder and shout
"Ill be right there bro" and shut the door.. THEN watch em so they cant see
you.. they will <and do> flip.

Ever nair a cat so it looks like a poodle? Thats good for a laugh.. as long as
it isnt yer cat...

Be a GOOD user, like Tempus...

BTW... since alot of people read these files, im gonna use it to my advantage..
FOR SALE 1984 Dodge Diplomat, 104,000 miles, COLD a/c, HOT heat, Can and does
beat mustang 5.0's with ease, runs great.. needs paint.. Have complete history
of car, NEW expensive tires.. $1800 OBO... Email me where it says below.. OR
call 925-1377 <data line> and email me there... <Godzilla>...

Suicide hotline... Please hold.

<Overheard on a hospital Public Address system> Will a proctologist please
report to the emergency room, theres a asshole waiting.

Anyway... its 5 am, im tired, im beat, im stoned, im going to bed.. I know this
isnt one of the more informative "Zillafiles"(tm) but i think you will find it
entertaining... And imagine, im like this all the time! <Ack>.. Oh, i gotta say
this, too.. Metro Dade PD?  FUCK YOU!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! <inside joke>...
Anyway, If you have any suggestions/Comments/Crude remarks about this or any
other "Your Brain on Drugs" "Zillafiles"(tm)... I can be reached at the
following BBS...
==============================================================================
The Citadel BBS.................... (305) 785-4038 ... Tell em I sent ya.
==============================================================================
Peace Out... Burnin in '92!!!!!
Look fer more of my shit headin yer way, to a BBS near YOU!

OH OH OH OH!!!! I fergot to say! as usual, no part of this text file may be
edited, changed, messed with, discomboobulated, or otherwise changed without
the approval of Godzilla.. if you DO change it, and Godzilla finds out, yer in
DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP Shit... <Grin>.. but nah, dont change it
folks.. its all i got...



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