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                         Underground eXperts United

                                 Presents...

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         [  How To Hack And Get Caught  ]          [  By Phearless  ]


    ____________________________________________________________________
    ____________________________________________________________________



                      How to Hack and Get Caught.


Before.

 1.    Always take notes of what you are doing. Keep handwritten notes of
       every phone number, address, password and name you ever come across.
       Date and time information next to the notes are especially
       recommended.

 2.    Save everything you download, capture or type yourself. Never delete
       anything ever. Never try to structure what you have collected, just
       keep on creating new directories as you run out of spare entries.

 3.    Never encrypt any information. If you should receive an encrypted
       document, be sure to have a plain text copy of it somewhere.

 4.    Do not use any access control systems. They will not make your
       computer more secure anyway.

 5.    Ignore your friends' warnings if they tell you that The Law is just
       around the corner, waiting to burst through your door.

 6.    Any kind of backup media must be stored very close to your computer.

 7.    Do not let the fact that you have been busted twice already for the
       same thing bother you. This time you will get away with it.

 8.    Keep your diary very well updated about what you are up to. Do not
       forget any important details such as real names and their
       specialities.

 9.    Keep copies of the documents you promised to burn after you have read
       them, just do not tell anyone.

10.    Any matter dealing with national security should be given the
       highest priority. Direct any questions to the local authorities.


After.

 1.    Confess when you are presented with the evidence, and deny only things
       you have not done. If you know who really did it, be sure to tell
       everything you know.

 2.    If the police should have misunderstood anything in your notes, files
       or what you have said, be sure to correct them.

 3.    If the DA should have forgotten any important parts in his case
       against you, make a list of them and send them to him.

 4.    Do not ask for the presence of a lawyer.

 5.    Plead guilty as charged.

 6.    When you are asked about your crimes to society, be proud and talk
       loud and clear. Never act like you regret anything.

 7.    Do not forget to tell that you are not into any kinds of drugs, and
       you were fully aware of what you were doing and what the consequences
       could be.

 8.    Deny anything that might be interpreted as something nice you have
       done in your life or career.

 9.    If you by some unknown reason should be found not guilty at the trial,
       immediately start babbling about how you are going to continue your
       dastardly crimes as soon as you get out of the court room.

10.    Do some serious cursing and attempt to physically attack the DA, the
       judge or the members of the jury, when you have been given your
       sentence.

 A bonus hint;

11.    Wear a T-shirt in court saying "Screw the Judge", "I commit crimes
       because I love it", "I don't give a crap about the law" or something
       similar.



Finally, a word of advice;

  When you get out, purchase a kevlar west and a heavy side arm.
  Never contact your old friends and move out of town as quick as you
  possibly can. Quit the computer business and lay low for a decade or so.


 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------
 uXu #290              Underground eXperts United 1996              uXu #290
                  Call ALTERNATIVE NATION -> +32-53-789669
 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------

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