ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ Ý±11 May 90±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±_ROR_-_ALUCARD_±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±Ý? Þ° Ý Ý A Þ° Ý M E N T A L T O R T U R E Ý ?Þ° Ý Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder A ßßßßß° Ý Uncontrollable Thoughts & Actions Interrupt Lives Tfile Þ° Ý Typed by: Doctor Murdock Distribution Þ° ÜÜÜÜÜ Original Author: Joan Morris Centere Þ° Ý? Þ Further Psych. Studies: Dr. Sheldon Jones - RoR - Þ° Ý A Þ_____________________________________________________________________Þ° Ý ?Þ Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Productions, Inc.úúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúúÞ° ÝÜÜÜÞÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÞ° °°°The HQ of SDBP, inc - 415/236/2371°°The Electric Pub - 415/236/4380°°°° °Primary Drop Sites°°°°°°Rat Head - 415/524/3649°°°°°Primary Drop Sites°°° In Susan Stafford's mind, people die. They are horrible Deaths, full of torment and torture. At times, she sees herself aboard an airplane moments before it crashes. They passengers are calm, smiling, unsuspecting. Only Stafford knows what is about to happen. As the plane slams into the earth, people cry out to Stafford for help. Bloody, charred hands reach out to her. Screams ring in her ears as she watches death arrive. Sometimes it is strangers that she watches die. Sometimes it is people she loves. Sometimes it is herself who pitches into a long, searing journey to death. "I don't remember a time when I didn't have those thoughts," Stafford says. "Five minutes wouldn't go by that I didn't have a lengthy thought about my death, their death. When I slept, I had nightmares. I would dream and I'd feel like I was dead. I'd wake up and still feel dead." Stafford is one in about 5 million people in the United States with obsessive-compulsive disorder. The disease has been recognized in medical books and literature for more than 300 years, but is only now being understood and successfully treated. THOUGHTS THAT TORTURE --------------------- Dr. Lorrin Koran, a professor of psychiatry at Stanford and director of the university's Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder Clinic, said 1 percent to 2 percent of the nations adult population has OCD, making it more common that schizophrenia or anorexia. People with OCD are tortured from within. Obsessive thoughts -- terrifying, horrible, insanely repitive -- fill their heads. Compulsions force them to act, over and over again. Dr. Sheldon Jones, a psyciatrist at Mt. Diablo Hospital's Center for Behavioral Medicine and a doctor with the California Psyciatric Medical Group Inc., says the public doesn't understand the illness. People use the words Obsession and Compulsion to describe common, and normal things. Someone who likes to bet on baseball games is called a compulsive gambler. Someone who spends hours zapping winged turtles and punching down building on Nintendo is said to be obsessed with the game. Jones says those people may have obsessive-compulsive personalities. The difference between that type of personality and someone with OCD is pleasure and the ability to walk away, Koran says. "The word obsession come from the Latin 'to besiege.' The mind of the person is actually besieged," Koran says. "Obsession are not pleasurable. They are painful, distressing and disturbing. if they could stop, they would." IRRATIONAL BEHAVIOR ------------------- His real name isn't Steve. He is 38 years old and he doesn't remember a time when he didn't have some type of compulsion. Steve, who lives in the Livermore Valley, wants to tell of his OCD nightmare, but he is worried that people will think he his crazy if they knew the truth about him. Steve's compulsions involve symmetry and numbers. Before he could study in high school and college, every pencil on his desk had to be sharpened to the same length and lined up in exact, even rows. The lamp had to be placed precisely in one corner -- not too close to the edge, not too far into the center. The closet door had to be opened just a bit -- not too much, not too little. Only Steve knew when it was exact. "You hate what you're doing. You passionately hate it, but you can't stop it. You are aware it's irrational but you can't stop," Steve says. NUMBER OBSESSION ---------------- It might take hours of arranging and rearranging before Steve could get down to studying. Then the numbers would start. He would read page one, then he might read it again. That was OK. He might read it a third time -- still OK. But the fourth time he read it, he would feel that panic starting to build. The fifth time was still OK, but if he read it a sixth time, he was in trouble. "To me, six and seven were bad numbers. You couldn't stop doing something on six or seven. Eight is a good number. So is nine, and 10. But 10 isn't that good because it's getting close to 11, and 11 and 12 are bad numbers. Sometimes I'd read a page 44 times before I could stop. Just talking about it now I'm ready to rip the table. It drives you crazy," Steve says. That is the most frustrating thing about OCD, Steve and Stafford say. Unlike some other emotional illnesses, those that are afflicted know that what they are doing doesn't make sense. And they knew that if other people knew their secrets, they would be considered insane. Stafford is 38. She lives in Pleasant Hill, where she manages to hold down a part time job while she works on becoming an artist. Stafford wears her long brownish hair pulled back from her face. Her skin is pale and smooth, making her look much younger. "I used to think I must be a monster to have these thoughts. I didn't keep it a secret -- I told people I had bad thoughts. But I never told them everything. I was afraid they'd think, `What kind of terrible person are you?'" Stafford says. She leans forward on the table, clasping her long, thin hands. "I didn't fear that I was going to harm anyone, but I feared that harm would come to them. I could see horrible deaths...burning, suffering, bleeding." Stafford describes herself as a person who "just didn't function." Some people are able to hide their obsessions and compulsions, and control them enough to work, go to school and give the give the appearance of being normal. Sometimes, they cross over the line and their obsessions and compulsions take complete control. "These people who become so absorbed they don't eat. They just can't function at all," Jones says. "In those extreme cases, we've actually had to go in and cut part of the brain." Most people with OCD are able to hide their obsessions and compulsions. Some can even control them for short periods of time when other people are around. Many people with milder cases can't function almost normally, Jones said. BRAIN MALFUNCTION ----------------- Doctors and researchers don't know what causes OCD, but they have theories. It tends to run in families, but a clear link hasn't be established. Biologically, researchers have found that in people with OCD there is a faulty connection between the brains frontal lobe -- where incoming information is processed -- and the basal ganglia, the brains nerve center. OCD sufferers also have decreased levels of serotonin in their brains. Serotonin is sort of a mental lubricant that carries the brains orders throughout the nervous system. Whether the illness is caused by the physical and chemical abnormalities, or the illness creates the abnormalities, scientists can't say. Jones and Koran say they believe it is probably biological and psychological combination. Jones says he believes at least some of the obsessive-comulsive behavior is used as a safeguard against depression. "If you can stay occupied with enough obsessions or compulsions, if you can keep your mind working on something that doesn't matter, over and over again, then you don't have time to think about depression," Jones says. Stafford doesn't know what causes her OCD. Part of it, she says, is probably biological. But a certain amount is her own mental defenses kicking in. "I had a tremendous pain in my childhood. Sexual abuse terror. No amount of therapy has helped. I have felt so much pain physically that I know it's better to feel the pain that my thoughts causes than the real pain I have. Both are terrible, but it's a lesser pain," Stafford says. DRUG TREATMENT -------------- The disorder is treated by two often overlapping methods. Behavioral treatment and psychotherapy works for some. In behavioral treatment, people who are afraid of getting their hands dirty are forced to stick their hands in dirt and are then prevented from washing. Drug treatment -- combined with psychotherapy -- yields the best results. Anafranil is the commonly prescribed drug, but Prozac, which entered the market in December 1987, is being hailed as a wonder drug. It has become the nations most prescribed anti-depressant. "My life was a nightmare that nobody understood," Stafford says. "Every day I'd feel like I couldn't go on. I wanted to die. But I'd hold on to the idea that maybe today they'd find out what was wrong with me. That helped keep me going. "When I went on Prozac it was almost immediate relief. Id' say my thoughts, the bad thoughts, were reduced by 50 percent. Now I have two or three a day, But I can feel them coming on and fight them. The nightmares stopped right away. "I've never known what it feels like to live this way, to wake up in the morning and look forward to the day. To have pleasure. To have fun. I've never known what it was to be normal....until now." =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= KEEP COMPULSIONS AND OBSESSIONS IN CHECK ---------------------------------------- When does a habit become a compulsion, a preoccupation an obsession? This checklist may be helpful in answering those questions. How much time do you spend in obsessive thoughts or compulsive rituals? a) None b) Occasionally, less than one hour a day c) Frequently, one to three hours a day d) Very frequently, three to eight hours a day e) Almost constantly, almost all waking hours How do you rate the interference in your life because of these obsessive thoughts or compulsive rituals? a) Non-existent b) Slight c) Mild to moderate d) Moderate, definite interferences with work or social performances, but still manageable. e) Extreme, incapacitating ever aspect of life How much distress do you have because of the thoughts and rituals? a) None b) Mild, infrequent, and not too disturbing c) Moderate, definite distress d) Severe e) Extreme, almost constant distress How often do you resist the thoughts and rituals? a) Always make effort to resist, or thoughts are so minimal no resistance is needed b) Try to resist most of the time c) Make some effort to resist d) Yield completely to thoughts or rituals If you answered "d" or "e" to any of the questions, it is worth consulting a psychologist or psychiatrist for diagnosis and treatment. (Excerpted from "The Boy who Couldn't Stop Washing" by Dr. Judith Rapoport.) =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= OBSESSIONS AND COMPULSIONS -------------------------- People with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder may have one, or some of the following obsessions and compulsions: Aggressive Obsessions ===================== Fear of harming others Fear of harming self Violent or horrific images Fear of blurting our obscenities or insults Fear of doing something embarrassing Fear of acting on criminal impulses Fear of being help responsible for something going wrong Fear that something terrible might happen Contamination Obsession ======================= Concern or disgust with body waste or secretions Concern with dirt or germs Excessive concern about chemical or environmental contamination Sexual Obsessions ================= Forbidden or perverse thoughts or images Miscellaneous Obsessions ======================== Obsession with the need for symmetry, exactness or order Fear of not saying things exactly right Mental images that invade the thoughts Nonsense sounds, words or music in one's mind Lucky and unlucky numbers Colors with special significance Preoccupation with a part of the body Compulsions =========== Having to count over and over to a certain number Checking doors, locks, brakes, lights Repeating rituals, like going in and out of doors, sitting down and standing up Ordering and arranging, such as repeatedly packing and unpacking a suitcase, rearranging drawers Hoarding and collecting Need to tell, ask or confess Need to touch, measure (Excerpted from "The Boy who Couldn't Stop Washing" by Dr. Judith Rapoport.) ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ ³ WHERE TO GET HELP ³ ³ ----------------- ³ ³ ³ ³ If you or someone you know suffers from Obsessive-Compulsive ³ ³ Disorder, here are some organizations that can help. ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER CLINIC, STANDFORD UNIVERSITY; ³ ³ 723-8212. Offers treatment and psychiatry to people with OCD. ³ ³ Also can put you in touch with area support groups. ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ³ THE OCD FOUNDATION, P.O. BOX 9573, NEW HAVEN, CT 06535; ³ ³ 1-203-772-0565. Publishes a newsletter and also acts as a ³ ³ clearing house for OCD research and support groups. To join, ³ ³ write the group. Memberships are 25$ for a regular member, 50$ ³ ³ for contributing member, more than 100$ for benefactor. Also ³ ³ puts you in touch with other OCD people in your area. Mail ³ ³ requests to "OCD Friend," in care of the foundation. ³ ³ ³ ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ Typed by: Doctor Murdock X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845 Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766 realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662 Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699 The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674 Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560 "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X