"Creative Writing, Second Grader Style" By Hanover Fiste Today I was looking through some stuff and found a little folder with my name written in crayon on it. Inside were a collection of papers I wrote back when I was in second grade. It appears to me they were what the teacher considered my best work in creative writing class. They are all written on tablet paper and some of them are illustrated. What follows are most of the stories. Of course, they have been edited, I wooden't whant to konfuze u with the orginal mispelings or the lack of proper grammar, which doesn't appear to be necessary for most second graders. "It's raining cats and dogs" One cold Monday, it started. The streets were frozen. First came down mothballs, then later cats and dogs. They sneazed their way from the heaven to earth. The cats scratched people on their faces and backs. Cats alone killed 109 people. Five people died from shock and the noise. It really was awful. But I was safe inside. The End Comments: Acompanying the story was a drawing of a cloud with a dog and cat inside it. A shirtless man has a frown on his face and his hands in the air. Another man wearing a green shirt lies on the ground screaming, "Help..." I must have been a very sadistic child for writing a story like this. I wonder if space on the paper prevented me from writing about what the dogs did to the people. This really is my favorite story. I wonder what the teachers reaction was. -*- If I were a talking toy I would be a toy jet space solder, with jets for speed and a toy laser light. I'd talk really fast and sound funny. You would like me. I run on batteries, but plug me in and I'd become amazing. You could control me for machines. On Independence day I would fly up and make sparks. I cost $1,000 and you could borrow me for twenty-five cents. A smaller version, that did less amazing things would cost $100 and be rented for ten cents. I am a toy robot made to help children. Comments: At the bottom of the page is a drawing of a little blue robot with arms and wheels saying, "Happy speeding friends!" When I was little, I always wanted a set of tin toy soldiers but my parents would never get me them. I was also fascinated by robots and lasers. I was, however, lucky enough to have a remote control R2-D2 robot. I suppose this story was what I must have thought to be the ultimate toy. -*- There's a phantom on my block. Tuesday night it happend. My best friend came over to spend the night. First we told ghost stories, then this big blue thing with a green tongue hit me. That morning when we woke up there was green slime. Later that day, we went alley hunting. We found some green slimy foot prints leading up to a cave. We went in and saw the same blue thing. It had green eyes and said, "Hi, would you like to have some tea?" We answered yes that we would. The thing told us it was from Mars and that we weren't in a cave, but a spaceship. We asked the Martian if we could go for a ride. As the ship took off, my friend and I exclaimed "Zowee!" An hour later we landed. We said bye and the Martian apologized for scaring us earlier. So if you meat a phantom, be friendly. Comments: Drawing is a big blue monster with red hair going all the way down it's back. Monster has light blue eyes and is holding a steering wheel. On a pedestal is a Play-Doh looking can that says Lime-Slime. The teacher must have really enjoyed this one because the top of the page has "Good" written on it. I suppose it isn't that bad for 2nd grade Sci-Fi, I did seem to have something going with the phantom actually being an alien. In the story there is a reference to "alley hunting". When I was six or seven that was my hobby. I would walk around the alley behind the houses in Lubbock looking for all the cool stuff people had thrown out. My favorite quote at the time was "One man's trash is another's treasure." I remember being deathly scared of climbing in the dumpsters. I didn't have the concept that trashmen were on a schedule, so I was always worried the trash truck would be coming by to take the dumpster. -*- Monster Night One night I was scared. I thought a monster was there. But it was a tree. My Dream The big trolls were after me. They were eating everything. We got them. The End Comments: These were on a mimeographed worksheet. I took the liberty of coloring it. I can remember both being scared by the tree and having nightmares about trolls. -*- The Lone Knight of Thunder One day a knight took a ride. In the woods were it started to rain. He saw a with and ran. And then a wind came. The witch and knight flew a blur. They went so fast it made thunder in the sky. The with and knight blew away in the sky. Comments: I don't really care to much for this story, I just like the drawing, it shows an orange horse similar to those in Thundar the Barbarian cartoons, one of my favorites at the time. The knight isn't even in the picture, for all I know I wrote the story after the picture. -*- Anyway, that's what I wrote about when I was in second grade. I really don't know what the average person at that age writes about. I think the teacher wrote whatever the title was supposed to be and we took it from there. I remember at the end of the school year the teacher told me that I was the reason all her hair turned gray. I think back then I actually believed it. About two years ago I saw that same teacher. She couldn't believe I had grown up. I have absolutly no idea if you remember what I was like. The End ( A little 2nd grade humor ) TJH