__ ___ __ __ ___ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ | | || | | ||__ | |__||__ | \|__ |__|| \ | | |\ / |__ |__||__ | |__|| | | ||__ |__/|__ | ||__/ |__ |__| \/\/ ...presents... My Shit, and How to Strangle It by Tequila Willy >>> a cDc publication.......1993 <<< -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- _ _ ((___)) ____________[ x x ] (:) / \ / | (:) __/ | (' ') | | /| | | _____| |_(U)|______\|/\|/____________________________________________ | || | | | | | /...\..\ /...\ /..\ ooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMoo I stood up and looked down. I could smell this one. It was full of light brown nuts - but I don't remember eating any corn. It was mostly a dark molasses color. Mostly. It had a yellow tip and there were green streaks along the sides. That was the part that was floating. It had broken in half and the sunken end wasn't oblong at all. The sunken end was more like a lumpy muddy ping pong ball. I wiped my ass and there was blood. My asshole tingled as I noticed the larva wiggling in the stool. Their wiggling sent the chunk of defecation on a slight counterclockwise spin. I wiped my ass again and there was less blood. I pressed the lever and watched my prize go spinning away until it finally vanished in the sinking whirlpool. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= And now for a FRIENDLY message from Tequila Willy... (:) (:) Flowers to brighten your day. | | \|/ \|/ Grass to brighten a cow's day. When did you first realize you were made from a controlled substance? It was three o'clock. Are you sure? (Am I sure?) Do alligators alligate? Do crocodiles crocolate? _ _ Does chicken taste better with Shake-N-Bake(tm)? ((___)) Do Madonna's hips gyrate? [ x x ] Does Phil Donahue masturbate? \ / .ooM When you die, do you lose weight? (' ') Will one more screw make you late? (U) Will LaToya Jackson refuse my date? When you need it now, can you wait? Does the Grim Reaper hold your fate? Do the Crypts and Bloods foster a hate? When I shoot my gun, will the bullet go straight? If I make up a word, could it be zoomdooboomdoowoomdoorate? How many enemas would an enemy enema administrator administrate to enemy sea anemones if an enemy enema administrator could administrate enemas to enemy sea anemones? [SEE FOOTNOTE No. 1] And I lie here; hungry, awake, and thinking. Even more drastically, perhaps what I see as terrible monsters with bleeding hairy warts, long claws & fangs trailing saliva and snot, and oozing and splattering big piles of putrid stool from overly large orifices, I call "people", and you see them as soft oozing squid-like amoeba leaving trails of green sticky putrid slime, yet because of the way we each learned language, whenever I saw these bleeding hairy warted creatures I was told they were humans and you likewise, then we are having dramatically different private sensations yet we are still communicating efficiently because we both call each "human". So it doesn't really matter if what I see is what you see because we both have a personal concept of what it is to be human. Like, moo, baby, moo. OOOoooooh... yeaaaah.... Me wann'em woman. FOOTNOTE No. 1: Yo, baby - you know who you are - jingle 'em for me! __ __ | \/\/ | .---------| |oo| | I / \__||__/ SMELL __/ | || | A | | | _____| | || | WUMPUS. | | | | | ~~ | Bushy Bushy Lives. /...\..\ /...\/...\ =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= In what manner or way consisting of or amounting to a large but indefinite number the injection of liquid into the intestine by way of the anus wished, desired one that is of or relating to one that is antagonistic to another the injection of liquid into the intestine by way of the anus one that administers esp. b cDc _ _ to manage or supervise the execut Roses are red, xXx ((___)) antagonistic to another any of numero Violets are blue, cDc [ x x ] ght and varied colors, and cluster of ten Most poems rhyme, xXx \ / to one that is antagonistic to anothe But this one sucks. cDc (' ') whose form, bright and varied colors xXx (U) y resemble a flower if one that is of or relating to one that is antagonistic to another the injection of liquid into the intestine by way of the anus one that administers esp. business, school, or government affairs could to manage or supervise the execution, use, or conduct of the injection of liquid into the intestine by way of the anus to one that is antagonistic to another any of numerous usu. solitary polyps whose form, bright and varied colors, and cluster of tentacles superficially resemble a flower? ooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMooooMMoo 1. Place your thumb and forefinger of both hands around the intended victim's throat. 2. SQUEEZE thumbs towards forefingers. 3. HOLD until DEAD. 4. Let go. 5. Wash hands*. * For sanitary reasons. _______ __________________________________________________________________ / _ _ \|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Kingdom of Shit.....806/794-1842| ((___)) |Cool Beans!..........510/THE-COOL|Polka AE {PW:KILL}..806/794-4362| [ x x ] |Ripco................312/528-5020|Moody Loners w/Guns.415/221-8608| \ / |The Works............617/861-8976|Finitopia...........916/673-8412| (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|ftp - ftp.eff.org in pub/cud/cdc| (U) |==================================================================| .ooM |Copr. 1993 cDc communications by Tequila Willy 01/01/93-#210| \_______/|All Rights Drooled Away. SIX GLORIOUS YEARS of cDc|